Friend

I'm a bit worried about Facebook. Not the actual multi zillion dollar machine itself obviously just what happens on there sometimes. It's not just Facebook - it's a lot of Social Media generally. I think there is a fine line sometimes between sharing and bragging. Now I like a nosey and I love it when people put photos up of themselves and the things that they are doing. It's nice to leave a comment - especially when you live a long way from the person. I love wedding and birthday photos and pictures of new chubby babies. I love photos of days out to interesting places. It's generally a pleasing thing. I just think it's a bit weird sometimes when people put posts up like "Had a great time with my friends last night". Why wouldn't you say that to their face - as you left their house? Why wouldn't you turn round and say "Oooh thanks, I had a lovely time" and kiss them on both cheeks or give a cheery wave? Why do people go on and on about how great such and such a person is and say how close they are etc. Wouldn't you just say so? To them? When they are in the room? Why are you telling us? I sometimes wonder if people see posts like that about themselves and are surprised about how awesome they apparently are or just how epic the walk round the reservoir was when they just thought it was a nice hour out. 
The answer must be partly, I suppose, that the post is really for others to see - to show how popular we are are and what an amazing life we have. But then how is that received by those who don't have an amazing life? What about the lonely or the struggling or those who weren't included? How do they feel I wonder? Is it like being back at school and finding out that everyone had been out playing without you? What about preferring the weaker brother?
Then you get these little things that say things like "Share if your daughter is awesome" What difference does that make to anything? If I don't share does that mean that my daughter isn't awesome?  The weirdest one is "Share if you hate cancer." Seriously? Do they get many people who don't hate cancer? It's all very puzzling.  

Maybe it might be a bit more honest to post something like "Had..... round for a meal. Not a sparkling evening really. Was quite relieved when they left and I could catch up on Pointless." 

Age Related Musing

These are my favourite flowers - peonies. They seem to have a short season so I buy them much more often than I usually buy flowers because I luf them. They are blousy and bright and in your face. A bit like Bet Lynch behind the bar in Coronation Street. Then, after a couple of days they open really wide and the colour starts to change - fading down to a very pleasing creamy colour. 

Now they are not as barmaid-busty and the petals become much more delicate and sometimes bits fall off. They are still lovely though and perhaps even a bit more interesting than they were in the first flush of youth.
So I was thinking - do you think they remind you of people? We may not be as bright and bushy tailed as we were but maybe still interesting, still pretty in a sort of droopy kind of way and still pleasing to an experienced eye.I expect it's just me then.

God's Measuring

I have been very moved by a post by Ang over at Tracing Rainbows about her friend who has died. You can and should read it here for it is beautiful. It has also clicked into one of my passions and my strongest beliefs - that God measures lives in a totally different way to us. Everyone seems to be obsessed with the deaths of famous people at the moment. I was very emotional about the death of Victoria Wood, a woman I related to on lots of levels and whose wit and warmth I loved. However, she was a popular and successful woman and, if initially I was a bit put out by how many people had said that she was like their own personal best friend (when she was, quite obviously, mine) I did understand that she was well known and very good at what she did so I could forgive them.

But I believe that God measures success differently. He sees success in a quiet life of service devoted to him. By our measurement, a lady who didn't attain much academically or didn't marry or have children may even be seen as a failure - she didn't manage to have it all. But we are wrong. God looks at someone who gives their all, who is cheerful and courageous and who loves him and he says "well done". God sees people who live through appalling circumstances and find peace and contentment in solitude as overcomers. God sees those who always try to be kind even if it means sometimes allowing themselves to be ridden roughshod over as heroes of the faith. God sees a life devoted to justice and truth as a life well spent. In the wake of the Hillsborough verdicts, I have read newspapers saying that people have wasted their lives chasing justice but I think that the families will not see their lives as wasted. Of course they would rather have never had to do it but it was not a waste of a life to spend it chasing down the truth for their loved ones or, as you could put it, hungering and thirsting after righteousness. 

We need to learn to adjust our values to God's values. To see others and ourselves as God sees. This life tells us we need to be this or have that and it is often a distortion. God promotes real values not plastic ones and the amazing thing is that these are values with a promise attached to them. Do these things and be this person and you will find who you are supposed to be. I'm just going to put here the Message version of Matthew 5 because I love it - although I love lots of versions. It is a challenge to start to use God's measurer in life with the promise of what will come if we do. 

3 “You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.

4 “You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.

5 “You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.

6 “You’re blessed when you’ve worked up a good appetite for God. He’s food and drink in the best meal you’ll ever eat.

7 “You’re blessed when you care. At the moment of being ‘care-full,’ you find yourselves cared for.

8 “You’re blessed when you get your inside world—your mind and heart—put right. Then you can see God in the outside world.

9 “You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.

10 “You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God’s kingdom.

They've Gone

Both FOWs have returned to their places of learning. We had a lovely week. Flippin' heck I ate a lot. FOW2 and my good self visited London. As it was her birthday treat she had stipulated no culture; as she was up to her eyeballs with all that at university. I was a bit worried about how seven hours in London would pan out if we could only go to Oxford Street. As it was, we made the train back with only fifteen minutes to spare. I must be more of a secret shopper than I thought.
We sat on the Tube on the way back - packed to the drawstrings with shopping bags. I only felt a smidgen of guilt when two anti-cuts protesters - placards and all - got on and sat in front of us. Should I have been doing something more substantial with my time? FOW2 reassured me that she had felt the same until said protester's terrible rainbow dreadlocks had meant that she had lost all her brownie points. Oh to be able to dismiss guilt so easily.
We also played host to Aged Parent for tea. I instantly became invisible as she spotted grandchildren, as is the way with most grandparents I suppose. FOW1 got a bit tetchy when she informed him that his face had filled out nicely and there was also a bit of a moment when Aged Parent pointed out that FOW2 was getting much better at expressing her opinion more forcefully. This was probably something to do with a conversation which, try as I might, I could not prevent, which was sort of about whether a boyfriend's career was more important than yours. Needless to say, they both had differing opinions about this. I cannot crush potatoes and stop World War Three at the same time. Male members of the family were conspicuous by their absence. 
Anyway, all things getting back to normal now. HOH and I ate our tea at the table tonight to celebrate the return to a quieter life. Not that we don't miss them like crazy. Haven't been to church for a couple of weeks, what with being away and everything. Am hoping that the Second Coming hasn't happened in my absence. Who would there be left to tell me? Anyway, if you were expecting to be taken and you are still here - give us wave will you.

Absence etc

I am sorry I have not been around. Sprogs are back around for a while. Church minutes to type up. HOH and Aged Parent struggling with colds. Birthday celebrations for FOW2 needing to be organised and then partaken of. Day job exceedingly busy. Have made resolution to try not to strive. So sorry. Not there. Be back. Deffo.
Am leaving you with nce photo of my new vac which I have sort of inherited. Long story. It works ok. It's no Dyson but most worrying is the way I am talking to it when it gets stuck. "Don't go under there" "Ooh there's no good is it - you'll never get out" Old age is a terrible thing